I have to be the first to admit – 2019 feels different in this space. I can look back and pretty much sum up how I felt each New Year “going back to work” in this job role, and it’s never quite felt the way it feels at this moment after 7 years. Back in the early days, when nobody was quite making a living off of working as a blogger, influencer, writer, however you may refer to it as, there was zero stress. I mean of course I felt like I had to constantly be creating new content, shoot new looks, etc., but it always felt somewhat trivial and like something I did for me, for fun. Then in 2016/2017 when things became a bit more serious, I felt invigorated by the idea of partnering with brands, sharing my pregnancy and putting more energy into “creating good content” as I know others did as well, and I think that people who followed along were GENUINELY excited about the idea that these regular joes who they followed were now PARTNERING with really cool companies. I felt a lot of support, and like my content was fresh, never done, original. In 2017 I began sharing more photos of my home, we traveled around Europe, and it felt so freeing to not have a full-time job and to dive in head first. To create this so-called “good content.”
In early 2018, I saw a huge shift – accounts were DOING MORE, everyone was TRAVELING NON-STOP, photoshoots went from pictures snapped on the way to lunch to EDITORIAL SHOOTS, and every post in my feed felt like AD, AD, AD. I’m guilty too! There were some weeks where I cringed hitting the post button, feeling like I was failing my audience, and myself, partnering with incredible companies that I believed in, but maybe one too many of them all at once. But how can you say no? It felt like a dream and a nightmare all at once, and I felt honored and so so lucky, but at the same time I felt so much pressure and so trapped to be this person that the internet feels I am. Perfect, always put together, endless clothes, extremely tidy home. I could feel the world giving up on bloggers, and mostly because I was giving up on them as well. I just felt like it was all too much, all of the dramatics and the ads, and I started to wonder who it was all for. Who is everyone impressing?
And I started to question what “good content” really means. Is it dressing up in a sequined dress and driving an hour to the most fabulous tree for a perfect shoot, or is it an iPhone photo snapped in my home? Or is that lazy? Sometimes doing the more natural thing FELT lazy to me, which is why I opted to do MORE, but the more more I did, the more ridiculous and unrelateable it all felt.
Now here we are, in early 2019, and it seems almost every single blogger feels remorse. They are all posting unfiltered selfies, promising to be more real, or to share more, and I am in the same boat, wanting to be “more real” but it’s really hard to know where to start, and to strike a balance between more real and just plain laziness. I know deep down that my following originated from being basic, and posting the minutia of my every day life that people connected with, but for some reason it’s really hard to go back to that. It feels like I am unworthy of your follow if all I am talking about are my outings with my son and my trips to the super market and the gym – because truly I am just another person living their life just like you. I think I can speak for many when I say we’re all wondering – where do we go from here? Has everything new and fresh been done?
I’d love to hear your feedback in the comments, and thanks for lending an ear. 🙂